Defining Our Values

The theme of values has come up quite a bit in my sessions lately and it’s gotten me doing my own work and soul searching.  Values, simply put, are our principles and standards of behavior.  As we start to unpack our own stories and unravel threads of trauma, it’s a natural next step to assess our values and what’s really important to us.  And in turn, as we start to get clarity on our own personal values and align with them, it starts to illuminate value differences in our closest relationships.  Sometimes our own healing journeys create ripples of change and can impact what maybe once felt like a comfortable and safe enough relationship with a partner, friend, or family member.

Maybe as you assess your values, you recognize the need for assertiveness and begin to say no and set boundaries in ways those around you are surprised by.  Or maybe you begin to value the importance of being genuine and begin to speak your truth in ways that make others uncomfortable.  Clients ask me sometimes as we get started if therapy will change them.  And the truth is most of us don’t seek out therapy if we’re completely content with the status quo.  We might not have a road map that first session that tells us how your life will change, but if you choose a path of healing, I can usually predict there’s some disruption and conflict that happens along the way. 

I started to assess my own values and alignment with them this week and I happened upon a fun resource that helped me along the way.  I started with a list of 73 values and sorted them into three piles: “Matters Most To Me,” “Matters Some To Me,” and “Doesn’t Matter To Me.”  From there, I took the “Matters Most To Me” pile and picked my top ten and then top three.  It was a powerful exercise for me to really assess my life and think through my decision making.  I’ve made a short list of values for you below and a link to the Live Your Values Deck I used.  This week, I invite you to pause and reflect on who you are today at your core and which of these values best reflects your true self. 

Peace to you on your journey,

Cassie

#https://lisacongdon.com/products/values-deck

A short list of values:

Honesty

Equality

Independence

Solitude

Empathy

Activism

Courage

Work Ethic

Ambition

Knowledge

Social Connection

Diversity

Vulnerability

Thrift

Loyalty

Non-Conformity

Service

Risk-Taking

Spirituality

Contribution

Growth

Leadership

Creativity

Fun